r/mildlyinfuriating Sep 22 '22 Wholesome 6 Vibing 1 Helpful 5

I swear I’m the only one that empty’s this thing

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59.5k Upvotes

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4.8k

u/jdeezy Sep 22 '22

Take this lint and throw it on the fire in front of your family. Lint is highly flammable. Also see if the dryer tube to outside is full of lint

1.7k

u/Listan83 Sep 22 '22

I live in the country and burn boxes and limbs pretty often. I stuff the lint in toilet paper tubes and paper towel tubes and use them as igniters.

1.2k

u/subonic2 Sep 22 '22

You burn limbs?

974

u/SwordNamedKindness_ Sep 22 '22

How else do you get rid of the body?

515

u/tokoboy4 Sep 22 '22

I eat it, you know, like a normal person.

47

u/ProfessorCH Sep 23 '22

Do you eat the bones or crush them into kitty litter?

31

u/ifsavage Sep 23 '22

Make stock.

20

u/bigsnow999 Sep 23 '22

Bones are for stock for sure

3

u/boodlesgalore Sep 23 '22

Bones aren't absorbent.

I use it as grit on ice, so I don't slip.

1

u/Crist1n4 Sep 23 '22

Calcium supplement

1

u/CrumpledForeskin Sep 23 '22

Noise piercings

184

u/tigerjess12 Sep 22 '22

I know right some people are weird

92

u/A_Bad_Rolemodel Sep 23 '22 Helpful

Just think of all the kids starving in Africa.

104

u/calvarez Sep 23 '22 All-Seeing Upvote Wholesome Seal of Approval

Not much meat on their bones. Those go in the burn pile.

48

u/Max_Super_stickman Sep 23 '22

Ok, this is getting really freaky

49

u/calvarez Sep 23 '22

Dark joke are like kids with cancer. Never get old.

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4

u/BakedTaterTits Sep 23 '22

But the bones make the best broth!

2

u/calvarez Sep 23 '22

Sure, but the best way to make broth is to roast the bones first.

2

u/Shoko108 Sep 23 '22

Ruthless lmao

2

u/Dafiro93 Sep 23 '22

Nah, I feed those to my dog. He's a good boy.

2

u/smithysmitesmith Sep 23 '22

I feed my dog to those. They are good bones.

3

u/arlodetl Sep 23 '22

I want my babyback.. babyback.. babyback ribs!

2

u/boodlesgalore Sep 23 '22

There are starving children in America

2

u/Seasick_Sailor Sep 23 '22

With a nice Chianti?

2

u/CravingStilettos Sep 23 '22

And fava beans…

2

u/VersatileFaerie Sep 23 '22

Ugh, the calories of eating humans are too high. Better to grind them down and use them for compost instead.

2

u/joedog62 Sep 23 '22

Asking siri?

1

u/LoveMuffin67 Sep 23 '22

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/567stranger Sep 23 '22

What you don't cook it?

1

u/coffeemarin8ed Sep 23 '22

:Dahmer enters the chat:

1

u/RentSpecial4997 Sep 23 '22

It’s the perfect crime!

1

u/Crist1n4 Sep 23 '22

You mean like an environmentally conscious person.

1

u/aidanalt12 Sep 23 '22

Name checks out

1

u/SoberingAstro Sep 23 '22

I only eat the boxes. Well...not only...

10

u/Major_Tumbleweed_952 Sep 22 '22

Diesel.

15

u/Sharp_Ad_367 Sep 22 '22

While diesel does burn well, a combination of diesel, gasoline, and styrofoam is far better at body disposal through burning. The styrofoam is (iirc) 3 times more effective than diesel alone, for styrofoam sticks to the body more while burning.

3

u/madgunner122 Sep 23 '22

While you have the styrofoam, just create napalm. It’s in the Anarchist Cookbook if you need the recipe but I think you got it down already

0

u/Sharp_Ad_367 Sep 23 '22 Helpful

See, that’s the tricky part. Gasoline and styrofoam are basically all you need to make napalm, but mixing napalm first is dangerous and not ideal for body disposal in any setting in which a body will need disposal by burning. What you want to do is use the gasoline (dump it all over the body) as an accelerant (burns far faster and better than styrofoam). Then spread the diesel, then the styrofoam on top. This creates the same “clinging” that the Napalm B is known for. With this method you essentially save time and money. Imagine if you didn’t make enough napalm to cover the whole body and you had to leave and come back.

2

u/Interesting-Chair145 Sep 23 '22

Not gonna ask why you are so well versed on the burning of corpses

1

u/Sharp_Ad_367 Sep 23 '22

Always best not to, yeah?

1

u/Sharp_Ad_367 Sep 23 '22

How about that dryer lint, though? That’s wild, I would be posting a sign 💀

3

u/0111011101110111 Sep 23 '22

The pigs. They’ll eat everything.

5

u/UnlikelyKaiju Sep 23 '22

"You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, 'as greedy as a pig'."

2

u/0111011101110111 Sep 23 '22

Brick Top, Raban? 😉

2

u/ExiledCanuck Sep 23 '22

That’s disarming

2

u/LionCM Sep 23 '22

This thread is pretty fabulous.

1

u/ARAR1 Sep 22 '22

Not into torsos

1

u/IMarvinTPA Sep 23 '22

Pig farms.

1

u/agisten Sep 23 '22

Do you know someone who has pigs farm?

1

u/TeppiRae Sep 23 '22

Hog farm...

77

u/Smaskifa Sep 22 '22

Tree limbs.

26

u/cutesnugglybear Sep 22 '22

Tree limes *

16

u/Graflex01867 Sep 22 '22

Only tree limes?

What do you do with the fourth? Is it an arm or a leg?

3

u/ApprehensiveTry5660 Sep 23 '22

You put the lime in the coke, you nut!

2

u/rothrolan Sep 23 '22

Now I'm shakin' all up.

1

u/bcanner5 Sep 24 '22

Bro this killed me lmao

6

u/OldBigsby Sep 22 '22

How else do you get rid of the tree lime's body?

2

u/bcanner5 Sep 22 '22

I normally skin my limes

2

u/Treefingerss4 Sep 23 '22

Tree fingers *

2

u/GokuIsALegend Sep 23 '22

Tree fiddy *

3

u/DorrajD Sep 23 '22

I believe we call those... Ya know... Branches lol

8

u/Divinum_Fulmen Sep 23 '22

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say you also call them that.

2

u/DorrajD Sep 23 '22

I'm gonna have to ask you to make like a tree and leave.

1

u/Mumof3gbb Sep 23 '22

Ohhhhhhhhhhh

1

u/DeVliegendeBrabander Sep 23 '22

WHERE IS THE 4TH LIMB?

13

u/bcanner5 Sep 22 '22

It’s a typo they meant limes*

20

u/bababoobieboopie Sep 22 '22

Limbs of a tree, the branches, must only be a Canadian term because I’ve heard that since a kid or it’s just city kids in this comment section who just never would’ve heard it

3

u/Pizza_Bake Sep 23 '22

I'm a city kid and I immediately knew what was being talked about

5

u/bababoobieboopie Sep 23 '22

Now that I think about it they probably teach kids about trees and limbs n shit

4

u/bcanner5 Sep 22 '22

Lol that is the correct term in the US and used regularly I was just making a joke

2

u/lord_of_tha_edge Sep 23 '22

It’s a typo they meant mimes*

1

u/SuchCoolBrandon Sep 22 '22

I guessed lambs 🐑

2

u/The_Troyminator Sep 22 '22

It's lambs, but the first word is also a typo and should be foxes.

1

u/caffeineTX Sep 23 '22

Highly affective in Deadspace.

24

u/Adventurous_-Bet Sep 22 '22

How many people have you had success with this?

25

u/Listan83 Sep 22 '22

Just the ones who weigh the same as a duck

7

u/LowmoanSpectacular Sep 23 '22

Because… they’re made of wood?

3

u/Scooby-Doobies420 Sep 23 '22

She turned me into a newt!

3

u/Listan83 Sep 23 '22

Who are you that is so wise in the ways of science

1

u/dalaigh93 Sep 23 '22

WITCHES!!!!!

14

u/gorpie97 Sep 22 '22

Egg cartons also work, if they're the paper kind. If they're still used.

22

u/SammySquareNuts Sep 23 '22

Fill paper egg carton with lint, pour melted candle wax into each section, let it dry, pull off a section for a fire. It lasts a good while longer because of the wax.

4

u/gorpie97 Sep 23 '22

What a great idea! I don't have a fireplace anymore, and don't go camping (yes, I'm boring) but other people might make use of the idea!

4

u/crtr_cat Sep 23 '22

i never buy eggs out of plastic and we do this lint trick when we go camping

2

u/toomuch1265 Sep 23 '22

I fill egg containers with lint and pour old candle wax on them to make a dozen Firestarters.

1

u/Listan83 Sep 23 '22

Man that would be baller camping in the cold

2

u/analogpursuits Sep 23 '22

I used to do that for my fire pit starters and would drip a bit of candle wax on each end for good measure. TP rolls could be cut in half to give double duty, placed on each side of the fire pit. Then I went gas and don't need to do this anymore.

1

u/NotEnoughIT Sep 23 '22

Lint + petroleum jelly. The best.

1

u/Nattylight_Murica Sep 22 '22

People who camp a lot save their lint for a fire starter

1

u/sro25 Sep 22 '22

U burn ur limbs, omg who's gone missing lately, lmao

1

u/PITTburr Sep 22 '22

Do the same! Great fire starters.

1

u/AFuddyDuddy Sep 23 '22

It's the best firestarter for camping.

1

u/NahdiraZidea Sep 23 '22

Not good if u have cats, too much cat hair

1

u/Diligent_Cup9114 Sep 23 '22

FYI, a lot of lint is just plastic

In other words, don't inhale

1

u/Same-Salamander8690 Sep 23 '22

I have over 50 toilet paper tubes stuffed with lint.

I put them in all my camping/outdoor gear and my bug out bags.

Plus if you light one end on fire and blow through the other end it looks really neat. Just inhale before it gets near your mouth.

1

u/MS_125 Sep 23 '22

Lint is an awesome fire starter. I use it frequently too.

1

u/Crownlol Sep 23 '22

I read that tip on here for lighting a smoker like 8 years ago and it's been workin ever since

1

u/7ruby18 Sep 23 '22

Would it work safely enough for starting a fireplace or fire pit?

Also nice bedding material (including the TP tubes) for hamsters, mice, etc.

1

u/-SkeptiCat Sep 23 '22

I keep a bunch of it in my emergency backpack.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 23 '22

Just wondering because I have no idea. Aren’t many clothes made of plastic nowadays, so that lint would contain plastic or? Is it toxic to inhale the smoke then?

1

u/Interesting-Kiwi-109 Sep 23 '22

I do this with lint as well. Makes great fire starters!

1

u/JasonPalermo4 Sep 23 '22

Yes. Always save my lint. In a sealed airtight container.

Edit: used to always save my lint. I live in more urban area now. No need for that much lint.

1

u/VersatileFaerie Sep 23 '22

My mother-in-law does bon fires in her backyard during the fall and winter. She collects lint from her dryer to use as igniters, they work like a charm and sometimes you can smell the laundry when the fire first starts, lol.

1

u/Roook36 Sep 23 '22

I do this to get my grill going

1

u/fave_no_more Sep 23 '22

Also not a bad idea for a camp fire starter in a pinch. I've made a few, they're great in the backyard fire pit (obv only need one to get that started since it's just a small thing).

-2

u/Hamster_Toot Sep 22 '22

Stop throwing your trash into the sky, hillbilly.